The Eternal Love

Once while talking to my best friend I asked her whether she love her lover still? Does it make her sad that they couldn’t be together and has she ever wondered whether her life would have been better and more beautiful than what it was now?

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To my utter surprise, she paused for a while and then in a very calm voice answered my query. She told me that when you love someone, you just don’t love that person. You love the mannerisms, you love the soul, you love the daily monotony. That soul becomes a habit. They become a part of your soul. We create memories and preserve them and cherish the just “being in”.

I questioned again. “But, what happens when things fall apart? When you get separated?”

She chuckled and said – “In case of true love my love, the love still exists. We still have love and love never fades away. The affection and passion can get dim. But, love? It just stays. Forever.

“How about the pain of separation then?”, I interfered.

“Ah, the great separation. Unlike the popular belief, you know the feeling of separation acts as a catalyst to increase our depth of love for our lover because love in separation is greater than the love in union. Separation makes love more mature, long lasting, and exciting. It keeps the freshness and spontaneity alive. It does not allow familiarity to creep in the relationship. It actually seals their bond even stronger”, she replied.

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I wondered for a long time, what is better then? Love or separation? I found my answers in Bhagavad Gita. In the eternal love of Shree Radha-Krishna. In many ways love in separation is more fulfilling and divine than love in union. In fact, union after a long separation is infinitely more pleasurable than meeting everyday. Real, mature, eternal, and unconditional love can be perfectly defined through the divine love story of Radha-Krishna. Their love is completely and purely spiritual because there is no selfishness or lust involved in it. Radha and Krishna are ready to wait for each other till eternity, till the end of time. Their love is pure, selfless and without any sort of materialistic desires.

It is the greatest and top most level of love; love in separation. They are ready to sacrifice everything for it, even the opportunity to meet and be together. They are ready to live only with the remembrance of each other in their mind and heart, without any opportunity of physical contact.

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Can any love be stronger than this? Can any lover be more mature than this? It is impossible. Therefore their love is immortal, and they both are worshiped since ages. Their relationship is the symbol of the purest love. They don’t need anything physical, like we humans do. Simply by remembering each other in their memories, they derive so much happiness and pleasure. They are divine lovers who live on the platform of spirit, way above the materialistic world that we live in.

This supreme rasa or relationship of Madhurya manifests itself as two primary forms.

1. Svakiya (Nuptial bond like Husband and Wife)

2. Parakiya (Non nuptial bond like love in separation)

Parakiya rasa involves sacrifice. You are physically separated from your lover. You can only remember him or her and long for reunion. It involves suffering and pain in great amount. You are engaged in other duties. Maybe you have a wife or husband, children, duties towards parents, society, and family. You need to satisfy all of them, but still you are separated from your real interest, your real love. There is absolutely no comfort zone. But you do not give it up. You continue to tolerate all suffering and maintain the flame of love, and protect it from dying out. Because you really love unconditionally. You don’t expect any rewards or pleasure out of it.

This kind of love is truly divine because it continues to persist despite all adverse conditions. This kind of divine love truly wins and gives divine pleasure. The pain of separation reaches a summit and transforms into a transcendental pleasure. It gives you amazing enjoyment which is unknown in general to anyone. This pleasure is even greater than union or meeting. Its taste is unknown even to the Gods in heaven, or the followers of Vedas, who drink the Soma juice available in heavenly planets.

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In this divine realm of Parakiya, you always wish for the well being and happiness of your love, never thinking or caring about your own. There is no jealousy or lust. There is a selfless attitude of giving and caring for him or her, rather than trying to get attention for yourself. You continue loving, giving and caring even if there is no chance of meeting your lover again.

People will never allow you to meet. They will never accept your relationship. They will never respect it. In fact they will insult you and call you names. But still you don’t give up. There is only a glimmer of hope somewhere in distant future. But you latch onto that hope and continue loving him or her in your heart.

Nourished by this selflessness and unselfishness, your love grows year after year. It gives you many amazing feelings and realizations in your heart. The separation, and the anticipation of meeting again makes it more mature. It is an infinite process.

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Ultimately it becomes so strong and powerful that no force in the universe can destroy it. Your love becomes immortal. The fruits of such divine love manifest themselves. These fruits can be enjoyed by the lovers for eternity.

This is the reason why Sri Radha and Sri Krishna are still worshiped even today, after so many thousands of years and they will continue to be worshiped for eons in future as well. Their love is timeless and immortal because it developed in separation from each other. It is selfless and pure. Whenever anyone talks about divine love, selfless love, sacrifice in love – the names of Sri Radha and Sri Krishna immediately come to our minds.

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Last few days, I have immersed myself and tried to paint my imagination of Radha and Krishna’s love for each other on paper. In the process, I felt loved. I felt an immense happiness rising from my soul. I felt divine. Have you experienced the same in your life too? Do you too think separation makes love stronger? Let me know your thoughts in the comment box.

Radhe Krishna!!

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